Social Media Has A New Dating Slang

Everyday, a new slang is developed and in the social media world, there’s no shortage of confusing language. This is more evident in the chaos that is modern love, from situationship to orbiting to zombieing.

The newest viral word on the block? Paperclipping. This behavior, reminiscent of breadcrumbing, sees old flames reappearing, not with grand gestures but with casual, noncommittal messages that are hard to interpret. Love that for us, right?

Forget boom boxes outside our windows or flowers delivered to our doorsteps. Instead, it’s more like a "how are you" text out of nowhere that leads to a very boring conversation at best or radio silence at worst.

"Paperclipping is a way of maintaining contact with someone you might need in the future," says psychology professor Wendy Walsh, PhD, relationship expert at DatingNews and DatingAdvice.

"It often feels like the person who reached out just wants to know you're there and that you'll respond, but they don't actually want to get on the phone or see you in person. It can feel very confusing."

While Bumble’s sex and relationships expert Shan Boodram says almost everyone paperclips to some degree (no shade!), it can turn toxic when real emotions are at play.

"Paperclipping can serve as harmless flirting that makes someone feel like they still got it—and sometimes that feeling is enough," she explains. "But when the 'it' is something that's not meant to be toyed with (think: devotion, desire for a deeper connection, the power to ask you to drop everything), then we’ve got a problem."

How to protect yourself from paperclipping? Simply put: Don’t respond. This might be easier said than done, but any positive response you give can reinforce the paperclipper’s behavior.

Setting clear boundaries from the start about the type of communication you desire can break the cycle before it begins. If you’re using dating apps like Bumble, take advantage of tools like Dating Intentions to explicitly state what you’re looking for. Being up front about your intentions makes you less likely to connect with paperclippers looking for casual contact.